Thursday, May 3, 2012

A Week of Reflection

This last week has been very trying for me mentally and is probably one of the toughest times I have faced yet. My parents divorce was official last week Tuesday after being married for 37 years. I know they will both be better off and this is good for them but things are not easy right now. On top of that they sold their house and the closing is tomorrow morning, as if dealing with the divorce was not bad enough now we have to go through everything that has been their lives.

I am the youngest of 3 kids, I have an older sister and brother who are 11 months apart and then I followed 2.5 years later. My sister is similar to my mom at the hip and my brother talks more to my dad leaving me to be stuck between the both of them. Needless to say I am very much a daddy's girl and my mother and I don't get along the greatest. Dealing with our strained relationship and the emotional issues with the divorce just has me on edge and I am so thankful that this part is done.

My wedding is about 3.5 months away right now and I have had a very hard time focusing on it. Trying to plan this while being in the middle of their divorce is just not easy. I feel like I am just beginning a new life and their world is crashing down. It's also caused a few bumps in the road with my relationship as well as we started to question if our own would work.

This past year I feel like I have been trying to keep my head above water and thankfully working out has been an outlet for me in that regard. Without it I don't really know what I would have done other than probably go back to eating horribly and gaining a ton of weight. That was the old me anyways and I have really become addicted to working out and the competetive and friendly atmosphere at races. I am currently 6.6 pounds away from my goal weight and I'm hoping to hit the magic number by the end of May so I can enjoy summer and be proud of my accomplishment.

Once I hit the weight I will have lost 35 pounds since my highest weight, which was a few years ago. The weight has been slowly coming off and I've hit the occasional bumps in the road where I couldn't seem to lose anything or even started gaining some of it back. I feel like I am on the edge of breaking through my mold and becoming slowly happy with myself in all areas and accepting my weaknesses and flaws. The last year has changed a lot in my life but without it I would not be the strong person that I am now.

Sorry for the long story but I really just needed to get it out so I can move forward with my life and live it to it's fullest.

What got you through a time point in your life?


  1. Hang in there, girl! I know how super tough that situation is...

    My son has been battling cancer for four years, so it's a mental battle every day to stay positive and focused on the long term goals, instead of the short term setbacks. Essentially, I had to retrain my brain (which is way easier said than done!)


  2. I am sorry you are going through all this :(

    I agree with the above poster and try to focus on the long term goals. This too shall pass.

  3. Hang in there, stay focused on your fiance's and your future. There are no garantees for marriages, but keeping outside drama away from my relationship helps me personally. And yes, I consider parents and siblings outsiders when it comes to my relationship with my husband.


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